True Service

Stop giving to get your needs met.

Give from a place of wholeness.

There is no need to martyr yourself for others.

What is best for you is best for all.

BE TRULY HELPFUL.

SERVE YOURSELF FIRST.

Affirmations:

I am here to be truly helpful.

When I give my best, I experience the best in me.

The more I say YES to the best, the more I have the best.

I love unconditionally, give from my heart and remember the Good in life.

True Service

Do you ever wonder why you are asked to help?

Do you every feel overwhelmed with taking care of others?

Do you resent having others ask for your time and energy?

Perhaps you are asked, because you are most willing and able.

When you consider all those in need, are you not the most capable and willing?

When you are asked, do you consider it a complement that you are being chosen?

Or have you placed yourself on others' lists with needs of your own?

When you help others, you will find you will be helped yourself.

We are all teaching and learning together.

We are here to recognize our own needs, prejudices and misunderstandings.

We attract those to us who will show us what we need to heal and learn.

When we give conscious attention to those who ask, we learn about ourselves.

Our resistance to another shows us the resistance and/or fear within ourselves.

Our attraction to another’s needs shows us our own willingness to learn and heal ourselves.

We can quickly begin to understand what we are learning by listening to our own responses.

We can easily heal our needs by contributing to another’s needs.

Such is the nature of human interaction and relationship experiences.

What we perceive within another exists somewhere within ourselves.

What we say to another is also being said for our own learning and healing.

When we are helpful to others, we are touching, teaching and helping ourselves.

The encounters we have with others can be informational and inspirational for us.

When we deny or judge others, we are denying and judging that which is within us.

When we welcome others, we are being open and welcoming to ourselves.

What we give we will receive, when we are aware.

Everything can be perceived as a blessing or a burden.

What makes helping and service a positive and useful experience is our own self awareness.

When we are able to respond to all things with kindness and compassion, we feel blessed.

When we resist or reject others, we are increasing our fear and negativity.

When we learn to soften our responses to ourselves and others, we experience more safety and peace.

Is it time to first take impeccable care of you?

Provide yourself with the best you know and extend your well-being to others.

Give the best you have and feel yourself strengthen your wisdom and wholeness.

Be awake and aware of the opportunity to love and serve others with what is within you.

Encouraging us all to contribute what is within us to share.

Be confident, certain and committed to do what is good for you and all.

Blessings increase ,when they are shared.

Betty Lue

Helping, Fixing, Serving

--by Rachel Remen (May 29, 2000) 

Service is not the same as helping. Helping is based on inequality, it's not a relationship between equals. When you help, you use your own strength to help someone with less strength. It's a one up, one down relationship, and people feel this inequality. When we help, we may inadvertently take away more than we give, diminishing the person's sense of self-worth and self-esteem.

Now, when I help I am very aware of my own strength, but we don't serve with our strength, we serve with ourselves. We draw from all our experiences: our wounds serve, our limitations serve, even our darkness serves. The wholeness in us serves the wholeness in the other, and the wholeness in life. Helping incurs debt: when you help someone, they owe you. But service is mutual. When I help I have a feeling of satisfaction, but when I serve I have a feeling of gratitude.

Serving is also different from fixing. We fix broken pipes, we don't fix people. When I set about fixing another person, it's because I see them as broken. Fixing is a form of judgment that separates us from one another; it creates a distance.

So, fundamentally, helping, fixing and serving are ways of seeing life. When you help, you see life as weak; when you fix, you see life as broken; and when you serve, you see life as whole.

When we serve in this way, we understand that this person's suffering is also my suffering, that their joy is also my joy and then the impulse to serve arises naturally - our natural wisdom and compassion presents itself quite simply. A server knows that they're being used and has the willingness to be used in the service of something greater. 

We may help or fix many things in our lives, but when we serve, we are always in the service of wholeness.

--Rachel Remen, from Zen Hospice

Betty Lue · 4.21.26.Service

Be The Difference!

Assertive people are heard, respected and valued.

Value yourself and be true to your words.

YOU ARE WORTHY.

YOUR WORDS MATTER.

Affirmations:

I am certain I make a difference.

I am clear in my communication with everyone.

I am consistent and follow-up on what I commit to.

I am clear, confident and consistent with what I think and say and do.

Make a Difference!

Be Clear, 

Be Certain, 

Be Consistent.

Make a difference with your children.

Make a difference with your spouse.

Make a difference with your friends.

Make a difference in your workplace.

Be clear in your communication.

Be clear in your values with your words. 

Be clear with your ethics and your behavior.

Be clear with your everyday life style and behavior.

Be certain about what you believe.

Be certain with your confidence.

Be certain with what you want to say.

Be certain about the standards you uphold.

Be consistent with what you say and do.

Be consistent in making sure you are honest and true.

Be consistent with the standards for everyone, children and adults.

Be consistent in how you live your life with everyone.

When we commit with clarity, certainty and consistency, all things are done.

The request will be answered, when we are determined.

The questions are responded to, when we are clear.

We are heard and respected, when we know what we want.

It is our doubt that inter-fears.

It is our questioning that hesitates.

It is our judgments that create a block.

It is our lack of commitment that gets in our way.

When we are clear, we communicate concisely.

When we are clear, everyone understands.

When we are clear, we can see and feel what we know.

When we are clear, light shines and empowers our choice.

When we are certain, we do not delay.

When we are certain, we step forward in faith.

When we are certain, we our confident with our choice.

When we care certain, we do not doubt or delay.

When we are consistent, we persist.

When we are consistent, we are determined.

When we are consistent, we do not quit.

When we are consistent, we proceed to success.

Whether at home or in business, be clear, certain and consistent.

You will not fail.

Blessings of Goodness, 

Betty Lue

Be Respectful.

Be Responsible.

Be Cooperative.

Create a Better World for All.

Betty Lue · 4.20.26.Be the Difference

Good Partnership

Every relationship is a partnership for the good of both.

Everyone wants respect, responsibility and cooperation.

We are all here to live and work together for the best.

WE ARE ALL PARTNERS.

RESPECT YOUR AGREEMENTS.

“PURPOSEFUL LIVING" with Betty Lue today at 2 PDT 

Free Zoom workshop at this link.

https://us06web.zoom.us/j/84884981492?pwd=0JG3bJiJCdHJ3W7PPKYRjN1yA4ibaa.1

Is your life what you want? 

How can you create what you want to be?

What are the choices you have to change your life?

Let us look together at what you can do to have what you want.

Loving us all in learning together.

Betty Lue

Affirmations:

We are partners in this school of life.

I honor and respect Who You Are.

I trust you know I will always be here for you and with you.

We are together in thought, word and deed teaching all the universe.

Are You A Good Partner?

If you want a good relationship, give your best in all your relationships.

If you want a fair partnership, be the one who is fair.

If you want more quality time, positive words, helpful service or anything, be willing to give it.

If you are complaining, know you are draining your relationship.

The time is now to be what you want to be, to do and to have.

It takes very little extra to create a lot more.

Life requires us to contribute our fair share.

Remember relationships require both people giving their best.

Complaining and criticizing, threatening and demanding, arguing and withholding is not helpful.

People seem to stop doing their best, when relationships are not working.

Parents seem to stop listening, when children are not listening to them.

Partners seem to stop giving their fair share, when their partners are not giving.

Taking away seems to be common, when something goes wrong.

Taking away love eliminates real relating.

Taking away help empties the relationship.

Taking away appreciation will exhaust any relationship.

The most effective way of changing behavior is rewarding the positive and ignoring the negative.

The most helpful way to teach respect and cooperation is to be respectful and cooperative.

Improving the language and tone in a household comes from eliminating your own loud crude words.

Teaching responsibility can only come from being ultimately and consistently responsible.

You can expect others to do better, only if they see you do better.

You can create good partnerships with friends, children, parents, roommates, co workers, if you are willing.

You can lead others to better ways of relating, if you are honest with yourself and your leadership.

You can practice principles of respect, responsibility and cooperation, and all will learn and benefit. 

Soften your tone of voice.

Eliminate all anger and upset.

Speak with wisdom and kindness.

Be helpful, when asked.

Stop telling or demanding.

Start asking with please and thanks.

Smile with your requests.

Take time to be helpful and generous.

Children, partners and co workers want your validation.

People love to be treated with respect, as honored guests.

Taking the time to listen is essential.

Learn to see beneath unloving behavior, and  you will always see the need for Love.

Everyone wants to be respected and valued. 

Begin by respecting and valuing yourself.

I respect and value YOU!

Betty Lue

Life requires that we be in relationship.

With respect for ourselves and each other there is open communication.

With responsibility for the quality of our relationships, there is a willingness to seek what works for all.

With cooperation there is encouragement to listen for ways to serve the needs of everyone.

When everyone WINS, the relationships are harmonious, peaceful and enjoyable.

Keys for Quality Relationships

With mates, partners, friends, children, co-workers, etc.

 Keep your agreements faithfully.

(Communicate changes honestly and immediately.)

 Give more than you expect to receive. 

Do more than your “fair” share.

 Receive everything with open appreciation.

Express your thanks sincerely and take nothing for granted.

 Live your own life in integrity and on purpose.

Clarify, communicate and live your mission, your path, your principles and values.  

 Be responsible for yourself, your work and live your life impeccably. 

Don’t expect others to pick up after you or take care of you.

 Stop using, blame, criticism or guilt to control or manipulate.

Stop making demands, threats or using neediness to get your way.

 Communicate effectively and respectfully.

Request a time and place and tone of voice that works for both parties.

 Be your best self in all circumstances.

Focus always on teaching by example. (and apologize immediately when you forget or neglect.)

 Use your time together wisely.

Focus on meaningful, positive and inspiring conversation and activities.

 Spend time, money, energy and resources only on what you value and want to increase.

Waste nothing in your relationship.  No arguing, pettiness, emotional dumping or negativity.

Betty Lue · 4.19.26.Quality Relationships