Tuesday, November 03, 2015

Feelings Communicate!

When afraid, I ask for reassurance and comfort.
When angry, I ask for forgiveness and peace.
When hurting, I ask for help and easing the pain.
When upset for any reason, I forgive my hurtful thoughts and feelings.

Listen to Feelings!

Crying, anger, jealousy, fear, all emotions are forms of communication.
Every emotional expression is communicating
Even without words, emotions are communicating.
Are we listening to ourselves and to one another?

When an infant, child or adult cries, they are communicating their needs.
Is anyone listening?
When I see children cry, they need to be heard.
When I watch parents ignore their children’s feelings, I recognize they are not listening.

The primary reason for not listening and responding is guilt and fear.
People feel guilty and afraid to listen, because we unconsciously know we have caused the pain.
When we recognize we have not been loving, accepting, understanding and helpful, we feel guilty.
When we feel guilt, we usually either withhold our love and withdraw or judge and blame the other.

When someone is acting afraid, they need to be heard and reassured.
When someone is feeling guilty and sad, they need to be heard and forgiven.
When someone is responding with jealousy and resentment, they need to be heard and loved.
When someone is hurting and feeling sorry for themselves, they need to be heard, loved and comforted.
When someone is behaving and speaking with anger, they need to be heard, respected and responded to.

When I don’t know what is being communicated under the feelings, I gently ask.
When I listen to words that don’t make sense, I ask what is really upsetting.
When I hear and see someone behaving insanely, I listen for the real reason.
When anyone is upset, hurting, angry, jealous or afraid, they are not feeling safe and off purpose.

Feelings deserve to be heard.
Feelings deserve to be listened to with respect.
Feelings deserve to be interpreted to source the underlying need.
Feelings deserve to be responded to with love, trust and acceptance.

Emotional expression may be exaggerated to get attention.
Emotional behavior may be extreme because of prior buildup of negativity.
Emotional words can be inflammatory to get reactive behavior and distraction.
Emotional interaction can totally detour potential positive healing communication.

Take the time to listen deeply.
Have the kindness to calm the situation.
Pause before reacting with intolerance.
Give your best response with the intention to be helpful.

With emotional needs, the person simply needs our kind, respectful and loving attention.
Let us always give our very best to ourselves and to one another.
We are here to truly helpful to everyone, of all ages and expressions.
Love works, so let it prevail in all situations.
Betty Lue