Tuesday, May 12, 2020

Do We Really Know?

I am here to listen and learn.
I cannot know what is not mine.
I am open and willing to understand.
I choose to listen without judgment.

How do we really know about anything?

We must make no assumptions.
We must listen deeper than the words.
We must want to hear.
We must not question or judge.
We must be a safe place.
We must care about the other.

Everyone needs a safe place.
Our children need us to listen to what they really need.
Our elders need us to hear what they really fear.
Our partners need us to listen before we tell them.

Without really listening, we only can guess.
Without really caring, we want them to care about us.
Without taking time, we usually project our feelings onto them.
Without really wanting to be helpful, we often give advice.

Most just want to be heard with respect.
Most want us to care about them.
Many want to hear themselves.
Some may want to learn something.

Do you hear others asking: Do you really care?
Do you realize their stories are to get us to love them?
Do you understand when people talk they are trying to get clear?
Do you realize self-harming is really asking for self-soothing?

I prefer to give advice or opinions only when asked.
I usually offer a confidential place with no interruption for a specified time.
I must clear my own preferences and be focused totally on the other.
I seek to be fully present with an open mind and loving acceptance.

When I respond to another’s need, I must listen between the lines.
When I share my response, it must be with respect for the other’s viewpoint.
When I counsel or coach, I ask permission to share my thoughts and feelings.
When I am listening to someone who has asked for help, I care without judgment.

Everyone’s motivations and intentions and perspectives are there’s alone.
To understand, I must allow myself to let go of my attachments and see things differently.
When I am judging, comparing or trying to get them to change, I lose my ability to understand.
To know anything, I must allow myself to hear you and know you and love you.

This is my healing work: to listen and know what you are really feeling and saying to me.
Now you can ask yourself: What is yours to do in order to know and understand anyone?
Always wanting to love, heal and believe in you,
Betty Lue

Listen to those you Love and care for.
Seek counsel when needed.
I offer coaching and counseling via phone, FaceTime and Skype.

“Life is for learning.
Education leads out of ignorance.
The more we learn, the more we know.
The more we know, the better our resources.
The more  resources, the more choice we have.”
The more choices, the more enjoyable life can be.”