Communication (See communication workshops in menu bar to the left)
See
Successful Communication Keys below!
Request audio link to the series of communication workshops we are offering in Jan. and Feb.
Communication
changes your mind.
Communication
changes your life.
Communications
changes your emotions.
Communication
changes your relationships.
If
you want your relationships to get better, change your tone of voice.
If you want your
relationship to be more kind, change the words you use.
If you want your
relationships to be respectful, communicate with respect.
If you want your
relationships to create more cooperation, listen and be open.
There
are many habits people learn from their family of origin.
These habits become
expectations or taken for granted, as the way people communicate.
To undo unconscious
habits requires giving full attention to learning a better way.
To clear the past
dysfunction requires conscious willingness and open-mindedness.
We
must genuinely want to find a better way.
We must be clear
about what we really want.
We must commit to
learn and practice new habits.
We must take the
time to stop the old unhealthy ways.
Fighting,
arguing and raising one’s voice is unnecessary in healthy relationships.
When we are respectful
and self responsible, we can easily share thoughts and feelings.
When we are upset,
unsafe or stressed, we need to step away and calm ourselves first.
When we understand
that all upsets are wakeup calls, we become aware of what will work.
Positive
communication is effective when we are consistent.
Negative
communication engenders guilt, anger, shame, withdrawal and more negatives.
Blaming and shaming
creates guilt.
Guilt causes
withdrawal to separate from guilt or blame and attack to project the guilt
outward.
When
we learn to communicate effectively, we step away from negativity and find a
better way.
When we are clear
about what is the call for love, we easily respond with Love and kindness.
When we feel what is
really needed by others, we clear the fear, anger, hurt and upset.
Communication is
most effective when all parties feel safe and calm and respected.
We
communicate at our best when we take impeccable care of ourselves.
It is essential to
listen and honor your own needs and respond respectfully to your own feelings.
It is impossible to
understand another when we do not understand or honor ourselves.
Healthy
communication requires we have a healthy kind relationship with ourselves.
Communication
is key to all healthy respectful and responsible relationships.
Loving us all as we
learn together.
Betty Lue
Successful Communication Keys:
Calm
tone of voice
and be on the same level.
Ask permission to speak
Tune
in to where they
are with desire to understand.
Give
what will create
the greatest safety and respect.
Talk
with kindness
and in private.
Step
away until both
parties are calm. Use time-outs as needed.
Defuse the stress, urgency and upset,
before attempting to talk.
Be
clear when you
don’t have time or patience to listen.
Write
communication to
avoid confrontations and arguments.
Allow
all parties time
to think about their needs and possible equitable solutions.
Encourage
using “I
feel….., I want…… and I am willing………
Seek cooperative agreement, rather
than punishment, threat or demand.
Open your heart to understand (“Walk
in their shoes”)
Choose an outcome where everyone wins.
More
ideas in the workshops……. ( listen on audio)