I send occasional Parenting Reminders and Relationship Reminders.
Let me know if you want to receive Parenting Reminders and/or Relationship Reminders occasionally.
By June, my revised Relationship Reminders book will be available.
And later in 2012 my Family Reminders book will also be published.
Yeah!. They are a compilation of reminders over the year put into a book form.
When upset, can’t sleep, stuck in worry and concern, you are being called to stop and listen within.
When there is no peace, it is because within you, there is a question, problem and concern needing attention.
When we have guilt, hurt, blame, resentment, fear or pain, we have our own healing need.
When we blame it on someone else or some outside source, we disempower ourselves and play helpless.
When we take full responsibility for our own happiness and peace, we empower ourselves to heal.
We cannot respond with love, understanding, encouragement and healing help to another, until we have healed our selves.
My suggestion for all emotional upsets is: Stop talking and dumping on someone else.
Give yourself a timeout.
Step away and listen to yourself with writing, talking aloud, praying and inner listening.
· Write down your feelings and thoughts.
· Ask your mind (mental computer) to dump out all it holds from the past.
· The real reason I am upset is: …………………………………………
· (Write down pages of stuff…every thought or fear, no matter how crazy!)
· Give yourself time to totally off load, dumping everything in your mind.
· It may be pages of accumulated stuff.
· Keep asking your mind “What is the “real reason”?
· You have collected years of upsets, mistaken beliefs, unforgiven hurts.
· They all need to be released and forgiven in order to be at peace and respond to the present situation.
· When we react with emotion, it triggers more emotional negativity in ourselves and the other.
· Find peace within before responding to the healing needs of another.
Remember: All anger is covering hidden hurt and fear. Anger is a cry for help and call for Love.
If you cannot give help, be quiet and let your love and prayers be enough.
Toxic material, (emotional Puke and poop), belongs in the toilet, never dump on a loved one.
When we are full of ***, we think, speak and behave full of ***.
Clear you head, heart and body of all toxins before you speak.
Do not add more pain to an already hurtful situation.
Stop creating guilt and fear, hurt and shame for anyone, including yourself.
The conscious person listens to the messages they give.
The conscious person gives what it wants to receive.
The conscious person seeks only the best outcome for everyone.
The conscious person notices what they are teaching and only gives what the student is willing to learn.
The conscious person is respectful and responsible.
The conscious person does not give unsolicited advice or suggestions unless sincerely asked.
The conscious person does not pass judgment, but seeks only to be truly helpful.
The conscious person always takes care of their own emotional, physical and mental needs first.
The conscious person holds a loving positive and healing intention.
If you are not conscious, step away and practice until your are awake and aware.
If you want to be conscious, first be willing and happy to take full responsibility without guild or blame.
If you are willing to be the conscious one, drop your need to “get” something and “give” what is needed.
If you seek to be truly helpful, listen only to Love and speak words of understanding, encouragement and love.
You can learn to do this by unlearning the ways of fear, judgment and anger.
Loving us all as we seek a better way,
Betty Lue
Recommendations for Successful Relationships
With mates, partners, friends, children, co-workers, etc.
Keep your agreements faithfully.
(Communicate changes honestly and immediately.)
Give more than you expect to receive.
Do more than your “fair” share.
Receive everything with open appreciation.
Express your thanks sincerely and take nothing for granted.
Live your own life in integrity and on purpose.
Clarify, communicate and live your mission, your path, your principles and values.
Be responsible for yourself, your work and live your life impeccably.
Don’t expect others to pick up after you or take care of you.
Stop using, blame, criticism or guilt to control or manipulate.
Stop making demands, threats or using neediness to get your way.
Communicate effectively and respectfully.
Request a time and place and tone of voice that works for both parties.
Be your best self in all circumstances.
Focus always on teaching by example. (and apologize immediately when you forget or neglect.)
Use your time together wisely.
Focus on meaningful, positive and inspiring conversation and activities.
Spend time, money, energy and resources only on what you value and want to increase.
Waste nothing in your relationship. No arguing, pettiness, emotional dumping or negativity.
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There are many more agreements which I encourage you and your partner to write together.
I encourage all parties to take time to re-evaluate your agreements monthly or on a regular basis.
As circumstances change, there is a need to re-commit to what works for all participants.
Families need to meet to look at the specific needs of each individual to be at their best.
Couples need to ensure that the relationship is “serving all parties.
Business partners need to return to their original agreement and consider changing roles as needed.
Life requires that we be in relationship.
With respect for ourselves and each other there is open communication.
With responsibility for the quality of our relationships, there is a willingness to seek what works for all.
With cooperation there is encouragement to listen for ways to serve the needs of everyone.
When everyone WINS, the relationships are harmonious, peaceful and enjoyable.
Blessings to us all in our willingness to continue to explore and find better ways of relating,
Betty Lue