Today is our 27th spiritual anniversary. You may know that both my life partner and I have an affinity for effective parenting. We have been called to spend time with all our grandchildren, in the most positive and consistent ways. I began learning Parent Effectiveness Training when my daughters were 3 and 5yrs and later became a PET instructor. I taught Family Life Education at our local Junior College for several years. I worked in their Open classrooms 20 hrs./week in elementary school. My Masters degree was originally in School Psychology and later shifted to Clinical Psychology. Robert taught elementary school for several years and is a natural teacher and caregiver for all children. My Dad taught me that being a parent was the most important job in the world. And so I care deeply for our families, all our children and parents learning to practice the best communication skilsl and being powerful positive role models.
Caring for our children’s minds and psyche is far more important than giving them material things. Most of the great leaders, teachers and healers have come from humble beginnings with lots of lessons in compassion and service.
Parenting Reminders (Very important for everyone to remember!)
How are we all responsible for this new generation?
What can we do to make a difference to our children and grandchildren?
We can change our course of action and our values at any time.
If you see what you are doing is not working for you and your family and friends, stop and change it.
Are we building a generation of dependent, irresponsible and immature youth?
Have we created a world paradigm of fear, neediness and disrespect?
Do we encourage by our example, words and purchases to be unlimited, powerful and independent?
Is our educational system and institutions supporting creativity and expansive thinking and behavior?
Are we buying what has no intrinsic lasting value? Empty calories, meaningless gifts, excessive spending.
Are we choosing to invest and support financially in what is good for the minds and bodies of our youth?
Are we treating our selves and our families with respect in how we talk and act?
Are we distracted making money, talking on phones, computers rather than focusing on our relationships?
Are we neglecting, ignoring and taking for granted about our most important investment…our children?
Do we trust and free our children to learn from the natural consequences of their behavior?
Or do we protect them and defend them against learning the real way?
Are we busy talking about, but not living the values we preach?
Do we have time to discuss values, ethics, mores, and principles of successful living?
We are responsible for our thoughts, words and behavior
We are responsible for our habits, healthy and unhealthy.
We are responsible for how we talk to and treat others, family, friends, strangers and authority figures.
We are responsible for the books and magazines we read, the clothes we wear, the friends we have.
Our children listen and watch us.
They model their thinking, speaking and choices after what they see in us.
They copy the adults to learn how to grow up and be an adult.
They imitate our feelings of despair and hope, fear and confidence, anger and forgiveness.
When they see us fighting, they learn.
When they see us eating and drinking unhealthy stuff, they learn.
When they hear us swearing, hating and criticizing, they learn.
When they watch our choices to watch TV or talk on the phone, rather than cook a meal, they learn.
We are responsible.
When we don’t care about them, they learn to not care about themselves.
When we are afraid and over-protecting and over-providing, they learn to be dependent and fearful.
When we find our own inner balance and healthy living habits, we can and will teach them by example.
Whenever any of us interact with an infant, child, youth or young adult, treat them with respect.
We are responsible for what we think about them and how we speak and interact with them.
We can choose again and change what we are teaching everyone one person at a time.
It is time to begin with ourselves. Live the values you believe in all the time!
It is time for us to take full responsibility.
We can make all the difference in our future.
Believing we care and we can choose again.
Betty Lue
From Dr. Wayne Dyer
What Do You Want More Than Anything For Your Children?
• Value Themselves
• Be Risk Takers
• Self-Reliance
• Freedom from Stress and Anxiety
• Have Peaceful Lives
• Celebrate Present Moments
• Experience a Lifetime of Wellness
• Creativity
• Fulfill Their Higher Needs
• Feel A Sense of Purpose
YOU must Demonstrate / Model:
• The ability to enjoy life.
• Be a positive example.
• Clarify what you know and how you feel.
• Be expressive (Feel–Want–Willing)
Average children do things right.
No limit children do the right thing.
Basic Principles for Building Self-Esteem in Your Children
1. You must model self-respect.
2. Treat each child as a unique individual.
3. A child is not his actions.
4. Provide opportunities to be responsible and make decisions.
5. Teach enjoyment of life each day.
6. Provide praise rather than criticism.
7 We become what we think about. Our thinking determines our self-image.
To Raise A Child’s Self-Portrait (Self-Image)
1. Encourage children to be risk-takers rather than always taking the safe road.
2. Discourage children from all self put downs.
3. Reduce emphasis on external measures of success.
4. Work at reducing whining and complaining behavior.
5. Encourage excitement about everything in life.
6. Encourage children to choose independence rather than dependence.
7. Teach children to be non-judgmental.
8. Encourage children to be honest with themselves.
9. Be aware in the importance of appearance to young people.
10. Encourage healthy thinking.
11. Catch children doing something right. Remind them of how terriffic they are.
12. Treat children as total and complete, now.
13. Hold them, touch them, kiss them.
14. Listen carefully to your children.
15. Give them opportunities to be unique.
16 Encourage their friends to “hang out” at your home.
17. Read aloud with them at all ages.
18. Be involved in their age-related activities.