It is Easy to blame. Easy to be a victim. Easy to judge. Easy to point the finger.
However, it is far more powerful, courageous, honest and creative to take responsibility.
Harmonious relationships come from the consciousness of just one party.
Being able and willing to respond with trust, freedom, understanding and love is the key!
When you criticize, blame, expect or judge another, you are always telling about yourself.
You are projecting your beliefs, righteousness, neediness, values and expectations onto others.
When we excuse ourselves from responsibility for our experiences by blaming others, we are mistaken.
Life works when we are able to respond to what is needed in each relationship with each moment.
We are free when we trust ourselves to know what to do and say in each experience.
We trust ourselves when we listen within for the decisions to make so that no one loses.
We love others and ourselves when we give what is wanted and benefits all concerned.
We minister to others by giving our best to everyone equally without conditions and expecting nothing.
When we are not taking impeccable care of ourselves first, we will expect others to do it for us.
When we have attended to other’s needs first, we may expect them to take care of us in return.
When we believe that others are equal in consciousness and ability, we make expect sensitivity and help.
When we have not given our best to ourselves and others, we may believe they are not giving their best to us.
We cannot assume others know what we need and want.
We cannot assume we know others motives and wishes.
We cannot assume we understand what anything means.
We cannot assume we have the right answers to any problems.
Begin where you are.
First things first.
Assess your own needs and care for them first.
Get clear about what you want for the outcome.
Communicate clearly and concisely your intentions, requesting support from those around you.
Communicate always without guilt or blame, without criticism and judgment.
Be appreciative of your willingness to take full responsibility for the outcome.
Notice whether the other is able and willing to support you.
The other’s ability to offer help depends on whether they have taken care of their own needs first.
Always appreciate any effort or declaration of willingness on the part of others.
Know that everyone is always doing their best all the time.
So forgive your judgments.
Forgive your guilt and your blame.
Forgive yourself and everyone, for all time.
Loving you,
Betty Lue
At my computer with Curious George in the background and three munchkins laying in bed.
Remember we create our own experience. We can forgive and choose differently.