Thursday, June 30, 2022

Families Matter

Affirmations:

I Love as I feel loved.

I Love to remember the Love I AM.

I dare to care to heal myself.

The more I love, trust and respect myself, the more I love, trust and respect others.


Families Matter


Everyone is important.

We are born to be with those who need our Love.

We are here to heal what is not healthy, happy or loving.

We need not stay in situations that are harmful or hurtful.


From a distance we can often love more easily.

When we are alone, we can more likely heal the fear.

When we forgive, we can see things more clearly.

When we are aware, we can understand, accept and love.


Families are the place we want to feel safe.

Families are to bring us into conscious connection.

Families are where we desire to nurture and be nourished.

Families are meant to be where we are protected and provided for.


When our family of origin is unsafe, we may not learn to love.

When families don’t nurture or protect us, we may not know how to nurture and protect ourselves.

When families become the place of criticism, blame and shame, we learn to do it to ourselves and others.

Family is our first school of learning from conception.


What we learn within our family system is often preverbal and therefore unconscious.

What we learn prior to going to school stays with us for a lifetime.

The false beliefs and fears and negative experiences in early child hood, shape our perceptions.

Limiting beliefs and faulty thinking become the distortion of our perceptions.


We can heal and clarify, forgive and undo, what is not true.

We can erase from our lives judgments, criticism, shame.

We can let go and learn to love ourselves.

As we love and forgive others, we learn to love and forgive ourselves…….and vice versa.


Life is for giving.

We are the gift.

It is in giving our selves that we realize the Gift We Are.

You Are the Gift of Love and so Am I.


Remember Love All the time and return to Wholeness.

We heal all brokenness with Love.

We remember our Authentic Self with Trust.

We return to our Natural State of Loving Kindness when we forgive. 


We can love from a distance and heal within our heart.

We can release the past and begin again each day to remember Love.

We can undo the fear and be clear about what is Good for us.

We can choose to Love everyone as your Family of Humanity.


You are my family.

You are a part of me.

You see what we can be.

When we’re in Love.


Betty Lue


Qualities of Functional Families

Respect

Respect is the Holy Grail of functional families. Being considerate of each other is the tie that binds, even more than love.

Emotionally Safe Environment

All members of the family can state their opinions, thoughts, wants, dreams, desires and feelings without fear of being slammed, shamed, belittled or dismissed.

Resilient Foundation

Healthy relationships can withstand stress, even trauma, and, if not bounce back, at least recover. Part of building resilience is being supportive of each other, no matter what.

Privacy

Privacy of space, body and thought. Knock and ask permission to enter before going through a closed door. Provide and respect clear boundaries.

Accountability

Being accountable means respectfully and reasonably informing people in the family where you are and what you are doing so they can grow trust and not worry.

Apologize 

When you make a mistake or overstep, quickly apologize, then ask for (and receive) forgiveness. 

Allow Reasonable Expression of Emotions

Expressions of unhappiness or hurt can be accepted and responded to with respect. 

Gentle on Teasing and Sarcasm

Don’t use either as a poorly masked put down.

Allows People to Change and Grow

A functional family lets people define themselves—and change those definitions. No “labelling”.

Parenting is Co-Parenting

  Parents, divorced or married, support the same standards and messages so children experience consistency.

Courtesy 

Liberally use ‘please’ or ‘thank you’, ‘you’re welcome’ or ‘I’m sorry’.

Teamwork

Functional families play, work and problem solve together. 

Eat Meals Together

Research shows that communication within a family is enhanced if we take more meals together.

Follow The Golden Rule

“Treat each other as we wish to be treated.” It was true way back when and it’s still true now.