Friday, April 21, 2017

Why Me?

Affirmations:
I am here to be truly helpful.
When I give my best, I experience the best in me.
The more I say YES to the best, the more I have the best.
I love unconditionally, give from my heart and remember the Good in life.

Have you asked: “Why Me?”

Do you ever wonder why you are asked to help?
Do you every feel overwhelmed with taking care of others?
Do you resent having others ask for your time and energy?
Perhaps you are asked, because you are most willing and able.

When you consider all those in need, are you not the most capable and willing?
When you are asked, do you consider it a complement that you are being chosen?
Or have you placed yourself on others list with needs of your own?
When you help others, you will find you will be helped yourself.

We are all teaching and learning together.
We are here to recognize our own needs, prejudices and misunderstandings.
We attract those to us who will show us what we need to heal and learn.
When we give conscious attention to those who ask, we learn about ourselves.

Our resistance to another shows us the resistance and/or fear within ourselves.
Our attraction to another’s need shows us our own willingness to learn and heal ourselves.
We can quickly being to understand what we are to learn by listening to our own responses.
We can easily heal our needs by contributing to another’s needs.
Such is the nature of human interaction and relationship experiences.

What we perceive within another exists somewhere within ourselves.
What we say to another is also being said for our own learning and healing.
When we are helpful to others, we are touching, teaching and helping ourselves.
The encounters we have with others are always informational and inspirational for us.

When we deny or judge others, we are denying and judging that which is within us.
When we welcome others, we are being open and welcoming to ourselves.
What we give, we will receive when we are aware.
Everything can be perceived as a blessing or a burden.

What makes helping and service a positive and useful experience is our own self-awareness.
When we are able to respond to all things with kindness and compassion, we feel blesses.
When we resist or reject others, we are increasing our fear and negativity.
When we learn to soften our responses to ourselves and others, we experience more safety and peace.

Is it time to first take impeccable care of you?
Provide yourself with the best you know and extend your well-being to others.
Give the best you have and feel yourself strengthen your wisdom and wholeness.
Be awake and aware of the opportunity to love and serve others with what is within you.

Encouraging us all to contribute what is within us to share.
Be confident, certain and committed to do what is good for you and all.
Blessings increase when they are shared.
Betty Lue


Helping, Fixing, Serving
--by Rachel Remen (May 29, 2000) 

Service is not the same as helping.
Helping is based on inequality, it's not a relationship between equals. When you help, you use your own strength to help someone with less strength. It's a one up, one down relationship, and people feel this inequality. When we help, we may inadvertently take away more than we give, diminishing the person's sense of self-worth and self-esteem.
Now, when I help I am very aware of my own strength, but we don't serve with our strength, we serve with ourselves. We draw from all our experiences: our wounds serve, our limitations serve, even our darkness serves. The wholeness in us serves the wholeness in the other, and the wholeness in life. Helping incurs debt: when you help someone, they owe you. But service is mutual. When I help I have a feeling of satisfaction, but when I serve I have a feeling of gratitude.
Serving is also different from fixing. We fix broken pipes, we don't fix people. When I set about fixing another person, it's because I see them as broken. Fixing is a form of judgment that separates us from one another; it creates a distance.

So, fundamentally, helping, fixing and serving are ways of seeing life. When you help, you see life as weak; when you fix, you see life as broken; and when you serve, you see life as whole.
When we serve in this way, we understand that this person's suffering is also my suffering, that their joy is also my joy and then the impulse to serve arises naturally - our natural wisdom and compassion presents itself quite simply. A server knows that they're being used and has the willingness to be used in the service of something greater.
We may help or fix many things in our lives, but when we serve, we are always in the service of wholeness.
--Rachel Remen, from Zen Hospice