Wednesday, September 09, 2015

Complaint Free World

I affirm everyone’s right to choose what is best for them.
I support always and only win-win solutions.
I teach everyone to be respectful in their requests.
I listen to and honor my preferences as well as others.

Stop Complaining!

If you have a complaint, do something.
If you hear complaints, do something.
If you get complaints, do something.
Complaining is a waste of time and energy, unless you do something.

When you whine and complain, it usually falls on deaf ears.
When you bitch and moan, it often is received as nagging.
When you cry and act out, it seems likes a child.
When you really want to make a difference, learn to speak up in a respectful and thoughtful way.

When the food is not good in a restaurant, talk with the waiter, cook or manager.
When the service is not good in a store, ask to speak with the manager and write a letter to corporate.
When your partner or children are not respectful of your requests, ask for a family meeting.
When you are not respectful of yourself and others, sit down with yourself and write down what you prefer!

Life has its mistakes, ignorance and laziness.
People have their unconsciousness, unhealthy and selfish habits.
You have your own lack of self respect and self judgments.
It is time to make the conscious consistent effort to make things better for everyone.

Every request must be given with total respect and confidence that others also want the best.
Every request should be directly to the person or persons involved with no gossip to others.
Every request should be clearly expressed either personally or in writing.
Every request must be offered with rational, non-emotional language.

When you wait too long, you may be overly emotional and probably pushy.
When you hold off to say something, you may feel fearful and frustrated.
When you talk to those not directly involved and those who are unconscious, you may be dismissed.
When you share your complaints in a disrespectful way, you will usually not be respected.

What to do?
Make sure you have done what is right, respectful and appropriate first.
Talk directly, respectfully and rationally to the person or persons involved.
Ask to speak to the manager or supervisor or owner if you want to get results.
Listen carefully to the response you receive and make a note of what was said.

For families, set a time for a family meeting.
For parent and child, sit down to talk in a quiet and uninterrupted environment.
For businesses, speak directly with the person in charge.
Always put what you experienced in writing and send to HR or to the CEO if no result.

In successful businesses, the customer is always right, so give owner/manager your honest feedback.
When you don’t speak up and talk to person in charge, things will tend to stay the same or deteriorate.
In healthy families, everyone matters and everyone needs to share their preferences.
Create a place and time with everyone present to listen to all creative ideas and requests.

Take time to listen to yourself and others.
Stop making a big deal over petty stuff.
Change what you can change.
Create win-win solutions.

Listening and honoring your preferences.
Betty Lue

Handling Criticism

Every upset is always a wakeup call.
All wakeup calls are invitation to get on purpose.
Our purpose is to live in integrity with our mission and principles.
When we are fully being  true to our authentic self, no one can upset or hurt us.

Every criticism is always about the critic.
We can listen and be grateful for them telling their truth, their belief, their projection.
When we take it personally, we are acknowledging that we have some guilt.
When we are offended, we are confessing that we are not wholly on purpose and at peace.

When my buttons are pushed ( when I have a reaction) to what has been said, it is mine to heal.
When I am hurt or offended, I need to stop and listen to how I can respond to myself with love.
When I am defensive, attacking, upset, I need to take stock of what is the truth for me.
Always I can be aware that the critic is talking about their own need and I can forgive them.

When we hear a criticism or what we judge to be an attack, we can best forgive it all.
When we feel attacked or criticized personally, we can simply apology for the upset.
When we listen within for how best to respond, we can hear what is really needed.
The critic is always describing themselves and expressing their own need to heal.

What we give to another is given to ourselves.
When we offer forgiveness and healing to a brother, we are offering healing to ourselves.
There is no harm in doing no harm.
There is continuing upset when we try to be right.

Where we have guilt, we will be vulnerable.
When we are not true to ourselves, we can be hurt.
When we have blamed another, we will fear being blamed.
When we are afraid of someone or something, we have not yet forgiven.

All upsetting experiences are lessons, reminders or wakeup calls.
All difficulties are challenges which we can learn from.
All seeming offenses are opportunities to realign our principles and purpose.
In our defenselessness, our safety lies.

When we have nothing to hide with no secrets and no fears of being judged, criticism is a call for help.
When we are free from judging, blaming and making anyone wrong, we respond always with kindness.
When we are willing to give what we want to receive, we respond with respectful listening and love.
When we are open to giving what will bring peace and harmony to all, we forgive and love again.

And so it is, we learn and expand our capacity for Loving Kindness,
Betty Lue