Tuesday, November 16, 2010

How Can You Be Helpful?

It is likely you give to others what you desire for yourself.
Depending on your personality type, your ways to help may vary widely.
What is helpful to some, may feel negative, limiting, meddlesome or overdone to others.
To be truly helpful, we need to know exactly what is needed and be invited to help.

Ways to help.

Some listen with love.
Some provide knowledge and wisdom.
Some offer healing energy and prayer.
Some give counsel and creative solutions.
Some share fears and their own needs.
Some give admonitions and demands.
Some provide novel approaches to distract.
Some give encouragement and support.
Some explain the rules that make life work.
Some are philosophical and trusting.
Some simply step away and mind their own business.
Some offer everything and chicken soup.
Some commiserate and offer sympathy.
Some empathize and bring up their own favorite fix-it tools.

Is being helpful truly helpful?

Know what you prefer and when you need help, be clear.
Thank those who attempt to help, and let them know what works and what doesn’t.
Appreciate the intention and let go of the form of help.
Clarify with the one you are helping what they really need by offering?
Listen to the needs of the other and/or ask “What Can I do to be helpful to you?”
 

Some generalizations:
Self Preservation types prefer to do it themselves/
Relational types really want someone to connect with for help.
Social/ Global types prefer to look for what they can do to further help others.

My family experience was one in which we simply saw what was needed and responded.
There was no need for asking or explaining.
There was simply: If you see something that is needed, it is yours to do.It has created for me a very simple and often silent life in which I am responsible.
My work is to keep myself open, willing and able to respond to whatever need I see.

The best way to be truly helpful to me…..
Fill yourself up with Love and appreciation and respond with Kindness to everyone.
Make no assumptions.
Take nothing personally.
Keep your agreements.
Always give your best.

Loving you and always working on living and giving the highest and best I know,
Betty Lue