Thursday, December 29, 2005

Anatomy of Illness

How do we make ourselves sick physically?
How did I give myself a two day sick sabbatical?
It was easier than you might imagine.

Stress compromises the immune system.
Holiday stress for me was not in buying (we do no special holiday gifts), but in planning and cooking for 18 people on Christmas Day and 10 people the next day. I did it all myself while maintaining my already full schedule of activities. The joy and ease came when I did my baking of 6 pies and 48 muffins on Christmas Eve. The stress came when I did the meal in the three hours prior to dinner. (I chose to participate in the twins first Christmas morning from 8-10AM.)

Using the body lovelessly is a prescription for sickness.
The stress was in giving myself too much to do in too short time.
When I push and rush, I set the stage for fatigue and physical stress.

Inadequate nutrition stresses the body.
Changing my diet from organic home-prepared, nutritionally sound to allowing myself to eat the goodies presented for the holidays, sets up the body for being susceptible to illness.

Lack of inner peace opens the door to illness.
Any form of worry or concern for family members rather than trusting all is well. Getting caught up in managing logistics with everyone feeling happy and well-served opened a crack in my usual inner peace.

So I spent my last two days forgiving.
I forgive myself for stressing.
I forgive myself to trying too hard.
I forgive myself for rushing and pushing.
I forgive myself for worrying.
I forgive myself making myself sick.
I forgive myself for not feeding myself well.
I forgive myself for making myself sick to get rest.
I forgive myself for getting sick to be alone.
I forgive myself.

And I appreciate my willingness to learn from everything.
I appreciate that I teach what I am learning.
I appreciate that I can easily share my life learning.

P.S.
Forgiveness is healing.
Loving myself is healing.
Appreciation is healing.
Spending two days in bed with lots of water, rest and self -love works.

I love everything I did this holiday.
While I will change some of it next year, I just might do some of it the same again.
So be it.

Keep yourself as well as you choose.

Loving you,
Betty Lue