Monday, September 20, 2004

Make Agreements You Can Keep

In relationships, families and communities, there need to be conscious collective agreements made, so all participate have a clear understanding of their role, function and purpose within the greater whole.

Experiences as coach, consultant and therapist have shown me that with clear guidelines and commitments from all players, the community will be successful for everyone.
It is the responsibility of the designated leadership to ensure that all participants are in alignment and equally committed to the success of the whole.
Sabotage, both conscious and unconscious, are the result, when any individual feels their rights, privileges and responsibilities are not respected and valued. Therefore, all members must participate in creating a safe environment where everyone’s needs are heard and respected.

Areas of needed agreement:

Leadership and Membership
How is the leader chosen? Who shall lead and by what method?
What are the requirements for participation in the community?

Decision-Making and Agreements
What is the decision making process?
How are agreements made?
What are the terms of those agreements and how are they to be changed?

Finances and Fiscal Responsibility
Who is responsible for the finances and the accounting?
How are the members to contribute or be assessed?

Division of Labor and Roles
What are the functions that need to be filled to maintain the community? (no part is too small to consider.)
How is is decided what roles to play?

Problem-Solving and Conflict Resolution
How are problems resolved?

Space and Domain Rights, Responsibilities and Privileges
How is space usage determined?
What are the rights and responsibilities of those using space and resources?

Remember that assumptions will create misunderstandings.
The clearer and simpler the agreements, the more likely they will be honored.
Everyone must participate in the agreement process.
Periodic re-evaluation of the effectiveness of the community functioning is essential.
Continuous education, inspiration and improvement must be made to maintain the successful community, family and relationship.

And remember, it is dependent upon the most conscious person to remind the others of what is good, healthy and essential for the benefit of all concerned.

Loving you,
Betty Lue