Saturday, February 21, 2004

Healthy Relationships

Here are some notes for my part of the Healthy Relationships Workshop this afternoon.
Remember you are responsible for your own goals, honesty, equality, commitment and happiness. If your relationships are not working there is no one to blame. Simply forgive unconscious habits of mind and choose again. Your life is up to YOU.

Spiritual Definitions and Guidelines
Healthy= what works for all parties
Relationship= where we see something other than ourselves ( time, money, career, body, others)

To be in a healthy relationship:
We see all with the eyes of Love, nothing to be feared, judged or avoided.
Physical world is to heal our perceptions. We see and feel, so we can heal.
Healing is awareness with no judgment, awareness with Love. Be aware and let go.
To heal is to release our judgments and renew our perception of wholeness and holiness.

Keys to Successful Relationships

Vision- Sharing a common goal. This implies having the same picture and working together, supporting one another in the fulfillment of that vision. When the goals are completed, new goals must be set.
Recommend: Set the Highest possible goal for your relationship with life.

Honesty-Be self disclosing and open about your current viewpoint. No need to gossip, rehash the past or compare with others. Be present moment in acknowledging your own lack of peace and responsibility for your own happiness. Erase with love=Forgiveness. True honesty is LOVE=Trust and Freedom. See beyond the surface and speak from your spiritual center. Tell the High Truth.

Equality- All are equal, no one better or worse, no one right or wrong. Each one is a teacher for everyone. Open to giving and receiving the essential gifts being given. Acknowledge your thoughts, words and behavior are teaching all. Give your very best all the time. Teach what you want to learn.

Commitment-Be genuinely committed to living your Highest Truth. Live by your spiritual principles. Be true to your word. Keep your agreements and promises to yourself and to others. Support everyone in what is for the Highest Good of All.
Be unselfish in your commitments.

Response-ability-Your perception, your judgment and subsequent emotions are totally your responsibility. To be in successful relationship take impeccable care of your own happiness by maintaining a state of constant forgiveness, letting go of your preferences and seeing what is with Love.

In relationships learn to heal your attachments and free yourself from the judging mind which traps you in the roller coaster of emotional highs and lows. In relationship learn that trust, patience, tolerance, gentleness, honesty, generosity, open-mindedness, defenselessness, joy, faithfulness give you everything you want.

Practice with everyone and everything. Life is your learning lab. Use life with kindness and gratitude.

Viewpoints from Mind-Mapping for Marketing

In relationship our work is to let go of our likes and dislikes. See what is and trust in the process. Love is being aware and at peace with what appears to be. Hold nothing in judgment. Let go and Love.

Amoral---I don’t care about anything. (infancy)
Ego---Its all about me. I am needy. (toddler)
Pleaser---Whatever I can do to please you. How can I make you happy? (latency)
Authority---Don’t tell me. I know and I am right. (adolescent)
Responsible---I am willing to do my part. Fair. Care. Share (adulthood)
Principled---I live in integrity with my values. Authentic and on purpose. (maturity)
Universal---Whatever serves the Good of All. We are One. (enlightened)

The more the beloved wants to please, the more we imagine we need to have likes and dislikes.


It’s free so come if you can. Four of my Partners in Health Associates are presenting on Healthy Touch, Healthy Communication, Healthy Eating, and Developing Healthy Habits in Relationships. From 1:30-4PM at 140 Mayhew Way, Suite 100, Pleasant Hill.

Loving you,
Betty lue