Monday, December 05, 2011

What Does It Take to Get Along?

Let’s be real and practical and effective!

Judging others does not work.
Criticizing does not work.
Demanding does not work.
Complaining does not work.

If it does not work, stop doing it.
If it will start a fight, do not say it.
If it will hurt someone’s feelings. keep silent.
If it is not positive, supportive, encouraging and appreciative, you need not give it voice.

When your own behavior, ideas and words are good, true, respectful and loving, you teach by example.
When you try to correct others, your are judging, making them wrong and acting like you know best.
When you believe you have a right to make others wrong, you are interfering and distracting them.
We all learn best from the natural consequence of our actions. 

Some people are used to fighting, conflict, arguments and heated discussions and opinions.
Some people believe to care is to be passionate, demanding, critical and opinionated.
Some people look forward to the adrenalin rush, the conflict and controversial arguments.
Some people create fights to experience strong feelings and negative connection.

However, most people think better when they are at peace.
Most people feel happier and more connected when there is no conflict.
Most people feel safer to share feelings when they know they will not judged, criticized or made wrong.
Most people want to feel safe, respected, connected and valued by those in their home.
Ask yourself what you can do to create a safe home environment for everyone.
Ask yourself how  you can change your attitude, memories, habits and thoughts to make it safe and loving.
Ask yourself how you can undo negative words, swearing, name-calling, accusing and blaming.
Ask yourself how you can interact in a playful, generous, appreciative and caring way with others.

It only takes one to make a difference.
It only takes one to be silent.
It only takes one to smile and hug and appreciate.
It only takes one to demonstrate you care by changing your mind, your words and your behavior!

If someone asks for help, advice, information or is seeking a better way, be helpful if you can.
Set a time and place where you can have a confidential conversation.
Be willing to set aside your judgments and allow yourself to care truly for the other.
Create a safe place where you know you can and will love them no matter what.

Be helpful by listening with your heart.
Be helpful by asking what they really want from you.
Be helpful by allowing your highest and best sharing from you.
Be helpful by encouraging rather then criticizing and blaming.
Betty Lue