Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Disappointed, Discouraged or Upset?

Whatever upset we experience is a wakeup call.
All lack of happiness is a signal we are off purpose.



If we numb our upset with drugs, addictions, busyness  or temporary fixes, we ignore the call.
If we seek short term gratification and never get to the bottom of our need, we miss the point.
If we blame someone else, we distract ourselves and delay our attention to choosing again.
If we feel ashamed or guilty and give up, we are quitting on our own happiness and success.

Are you appreciating what you have?
Are you clear about what makes you happy?
Do you know what works in your life?
Are you free to make your own choices?
Have you been following someone else’s lead?
Do you listen to your own heart and conscience?
Are you open to finding a different part to play?
Do you trust your inner guidance and spiritual direction?
Are you a passenger in life, taking tickets or driving the bus?
If you are flying the plane, the high and fast way, does your destination please you?
Do you have an inspired life that fills your heart with joy, your mind with ease and energizes your body?
Do you see the amazing and diverse choices before you?
Are you distracted by what others have and do and make?
Do you detour or delay your own plans and visions with the complexity of worldly choices?
Do you take 100% responsibility for your failures and successes?
Are you willing to ask for help when you need it?
Do you easily forgive others mistakes and your own?
Do you learn quickly and easily and make course corrections as they are needed?
Are you resilient and flexible, bouncing back to try again, seeking a better way, until you succeed?

  • Forgive yourself quickly and choose again for a better way.
  • Forgive others easily and offer to help.
  • Respond to every upset…yours or theirs…. with the respect and kindness that you would like.
  • Give everyone the benefit of doubting your judgments.
  • Acknowledge that you do not know (nor do they) or you would have done better.
  • Respect the learning process. 
  • Correct no one except yourself.
Remember it only takes one to make the difference and YOU ARE THAT ONE!

When someone else is upset, what do they want?

  • Don’t guess or assume you know.
  • Don’t take it personally and react or defend.
  • Don’t make up it is the same for everyone.
  • Ask how you can help with respect and love.
  • Pay attention to what they say.
  • Don’t try to fix or make it go away.
  • Take the time to listen and respond with what is wanted.
  • Trust in the process for each one of us is learning to find better ways to live and love.
  • Give your best all the time.

Loving me and you as we all seek to find a better way to relate and communicate,
Betty Lue
Keys to Successful Relationships
 
Joining-Create a common vision or shared goal.
 
Honesty- Communicate your true intention without secrets or withholds.
 
Equality-Each is giving the best they know in each moment.
 
Commitment- Agree to what is highest and best for both parties.
 
Responsibility- Be able and willing to respond consciously to all relationship needs without guilt or blame.   Be respectful and forgiving of mistakes made.