Affirmations:
I think, speak and act with respect and consideration for everyone.
I treat others as I want to be treated.
I live my life with respect, responsibility and cooperation with others.
I forgive all immature, emotionally reactive behavior.
Are You a Conscious Adult?
Are you behaving like a mature person?
Are you able to control your emotions?
Do you respond with respect and kindness?
Are you listening to what others are really saying?
If you are the conscious adult, you will behave like a mature adult.
If you are aware of where others are coming from, you will be responsive to their needs.
If you realize that reading this email is a sign of maturity, you will away from childish behavior.
Ir you recognize you are the source of Love in your relationship, you will remember to give Love.
Mature adults do not behave like children or critical parents.
Mature adults speak and act in ways that create adult responses.
Mature adults are respectful and considerate, compassionate and kind.
Mature adults seek creative solutions and offer responsible responses.
If you are a conscious adult, you will not think, talk or behave in childish ways.
If you are a mature adult, you will respond with love to those lacking in love.
If you are a conscious adult, you will give your best to everyone, beginning with yourself.
If you are a mature adult, you will remember to clear the fear and judgments with forgiveness.
If you are awake and aware, you will step away from useless arguments and fighting.
If you are respectful and responsible, you will see solutions in which no one loses.
If you are caring and compassionate, you will take time to listen and learn what is truly helpful.
If you are giving what you want to have, you will see the needs and fill them in yourself and others.
Crying, complaining, and criticizing are camouflage for what is your responsibility.
When you see a need in yourself and others, it is yours to fill.
When you feel a lack in yourself and others, it is yours to clear the limiting emotional patters.
When you hear a call for love, it is yours to find the Love in you to awaken the Love in others.
We are here to erase what calls us to be as a child, needy and dependent.
When we are waiting for someone else to do it for us, we have forgotten who we Are.
When we are blaming someone else for what is missing, we have neglected to take responsibility.
When we are allowing us to be hurt, scared and alone, we must remember what is our choosing.
We are responsible and capable.
We are good enough.
We are smart enough.
And besides people like us!!
It is time for us to grow up and take responsibility for the entirety of our lives.
No more whining, blaming and feeling sorry for ourselves.
Cleaning up the past is easy if we begin now without blaming anyone.
Start new each day with Being Clear, Certain, Consistent and Sincere.
Love being capable and responsible.
It works!
Betty Lue
FYI
Nothing good comes from acting when angry or upset.
When upset or angry about anything.
Calm yourself before you act or speak.
- STOP
- Breathe deeply, fully and freely.
- Step away.
- Leave the situation until you are calm.
Nothing good comes from acting when angry or upset.
This is a life lesson in learning to wait until your inner emotional storm has passed.
Only when you are calm and clear can you make effective decisions.
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SUCCESSFUL COMMUNICATION KEYS:
Calm tone of voice and be on the same level.
Ask permission to speak
Tune in to where they are with desire to understand.
Give what will create the greatest safety and respect.
Talk with kindness and in private.
Step away until both parties are calm. Use time-outs as needed.
Defuse the stress, urgency and upset, before attempting to talk.
Be clear when you don’t have time or patience to listen.
Write communication to avoid confrontations and arguments.
Allow all parties time to think about their needs and possible equitable solutions.
Encourage using “I feel….., I want…… and I am willing………
Seek cooperative agreement, rather than punishment, threat or demand.
Open your heart to understand (“Walk in their shoes”)
Choose an outcome where everyone wins.
Healthy Habits
Listen with an open and quiet mind.
Wait your turn to speak.
Appreciate what others say.
Honor all differences.
Respect everyone’s communication.
Seek to understand before being understood.
Put first things first.
Happy Relationships before being Right!
Unhealthy Communication Habits
Do Not:
Interrupt or chime in without receiving permission.
Judge what others are saying.
Believe your ideas are more important.
Disagree or correct what others are saying.
Toxic thoughts, words and actions must be dumped in safe ways.
Never puke and poop on people.
What is hurtful and makes up sick must be released in private dumping grounds.
Learn to flush the toilet, write it and burn it, let it go to do no harm.
Most Destructive Blocks to Healthy Communication
1) Nagging and Criticism ( Use constructive requests and be specific.)
2) Defensiveness (Listen and make no excuses.)
3) Contempt with Name-Calling, Belittling and Shaming ( No using guilt or blame.)
4) Stone-Walling, Ignoring and silent treatment ( Talk or write when calm.)
5) Belligerence, Threatening, Demanding
Forgive yourself for using power to get your way.