Affirmations:
I am most helpful, when I take impeccable care of myself.
What is best for me is best for others.
I let go of fixing or being attached to others’ changes.
I allow others to take care of themselves and their own learning and
growth.
When we try too
hard, we may deplete ourselves.
When we do too much,
we may sacrifice.
When we take care of
others, we may deny ourselves.
When we give too
much, we may expect something in return.
When we try to
help because we think it is needed, we may teach others to depend on us.
When we give to
teach or tell when not asked, we may make them feel less or inadequate.
When we do what
others can do for themselves, we may keep others feeling weak or babied.
When we give to
others to make them love us, we may make them feel entitled to always get.
People may become
resentful when we give what we think they want.
People may feel
guilty about no being so giving or helpful or kind.
People may stay away
or resist our kindness, because they feel manipulated.
People may simply
not care about what we deem important or essential.
Givers may
attract takers.
Givers may foster
dependence.
Givers may create
neediness.
Givers may burn out
and become resentful.
When we focus on
what is wrong or needs to be fixed, we are generating more dependence.
In a time where
people learn to manipulate to get their needs met, we need to forgive
ourselves.
In a way we empower
the weak and may criticize or judge the strong.
We may make it right
or clever to “do less and get more”.
To give to those
who want to receive and will learn and benefit, we must be awake and aware.
Give to those who
ask, as long as it does no harm to them or to you.
Give to those who
are appreciative of the gifts we give.
Give to those who
give to others and pay it forward.
When I am asked
for help:
I set aside
private time.
I make the giving
confidential.
I give the best I
have when I am at my best.
I honor my own
needs first and give with gratitude and joy.
I receive the
learning and help I share with a replenishment.
I am grateful for
the gratitude and respect I receive.
I say “No” with
love when it is not best for me.
I model the
highest I know in offering help and kindness.
I treat others’
choices with respect and allowance.
I trust everyone
to make their own choices from which to learn.
I show up, pay
attention, tell the highest truth I know and detach from the outcome.
I give my best
and forgive the rest.
Being truly
helpful and kind is allowing others to live and learn without our interference.
Being truly helpful
may be to trust people to do what they do, to get the result they need to
learn.
Being truly helpful
is often saying “No” with kindness and letting others find their own
way.
Being truly helpful
may be to simply acknowledge, “I know you can do it yourself.”
Let go of
attachment on always being the giver.
Be helpful and kind
to yourself first.
Betty Lue
Letter of Learning from a Reminders Reader
You
really helped me to not try to get them to eat more healthy, nutritious food.
If
I fix a nutritious something for them to try, that's okay, knowing they may or
may not want to try it or finish it. Letting go of the result is harder, but I
do it only if I feel I'm not attached to the outcome. Sometimes, I find I have
attachment to the outcome, so I know I need to release it.
If
I don't clean their kitchen, bathroom etc at his home, it doesn't get done.
What I'm doing is cleaning here & there when I have the time and when
I won't have any resentment or judgments. If I do, I need to stop what
I'm doing to not bring a negative vibe into the situation.
It's
a challenge, but I'm spreading my wings with what I am to be and do re: my
Soul's Purpose and making progress re: that. When I make mistakes and
choose wrongly, I mostly let go and choose again.
If
I don't do it right away, I know I need to let go, forgive, surrender, allow
and trust. I don't do it perfectly, but I'm clearing up mistakes and wrong
choices much faster.
I
really appreciate your wisdom! This Loving Reminder is reminding me to pay
even more attention re: the
learning situations I face and let go even more. Having more fun and freedom to
be and do makes me helps
me let go of carrying any false responsibility.