Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Healthy Relationships

Healthy relationships work for both parties.
Healthy relationships look out for each other as well as themselves.
Healthy relationships inspire, support, heal and grow both people.
Healthy relationships bring up past unhealed stuff for healing.

When we are in healthy relationship, we are committed to healing ourselves.
Relationships show us where we have blocks to unconditional love and acceptance.
Relationships give us opportunities to take responsibility for our own neediness.
Relationships demonstrate where we are unwilling or ignorant of how to heal ourselves.

When we make the other the cause of our neediness or hurt feelings, we are denying our responsibility.
When we use the other to blame, to support, to fix us, we are ignoring our own need to love ourselves.
When we neglect our own needs to try to fix, support or change the other, we are not loving ourselves.
When we put maintaining the relationship or seeking the other’s approval first, we have forsaken ourselves.

Healthy relationships establish mutual respect.
In healthy relationships we understand each person has their own path, problems and healing to do.
We do not interfere with our opinions, advice or help, unless we are asked.
We love, accept and respect the other’s privacy, timing and way to handle unhealed stuff or lack of love.

Healthy relationships recognize that under the petty stuff there is unconditional love and positive regard.
Healthy relationships stop talking about the “painful” stuff when it is not clearing or healing or kind.
Healthy relationships mind their own business instead of overseeing and managing the other.
Healthy relationships recognize and manage their own neediness, woundedness and vulnerability.

When we truly love and respect and trust ourselves, we can serve without attachment.
When we know and honor ourselves, we can be present with compassion and without investment.
When we are protecting and providing, nurturing and nourishing ourselves, we stop seeking from others.
When we are at peace with our own path and life calling, we can truly love unconditionally without end.

We are here to heal all relationships through all time.
We are here to remove all blocks to love everyone unconditionally.
We are here to fully extend our love and peace to ourselves first.
We are here to remember that love is the way we return to our natural state of Oneness.

Everything we do and say and imagine, can be a gift of healing or a curse of harm.
We have to remember that what we give we receive as we give it.
Where we cannot love another, we are denying ourselves.
When we can forgive and extend unconditional Love, Respect and Trust to another, we are giving to ourselves.

And so it is, in all our relationships we are either extending trust and freedom to ourselves or judging and denying ourselves the very thing we want to experience.
There is no outside person or situation that keeps us from experiencing the Love , security, Peace and Happiness we want.
Everything we want, we have already ……when we give it freely to all with whom we relate.
The cost of giving is receiving.

And so it is we learn.

Loving us all as One,
Betty Lue
Healing Our Projections => Seeing Only Wholeness
1.         We perceive what we believe.
2.         We believe what we think we are.
3.         If I believe I am my past, then I believe you are your past.
4.         Believing in my past is to see it and live it over and over again in all I see and do and am.
5.         Believing in your past is to remember it and lay blame with my judgments of you.
6.         The more I feel guilty about my past, the more I place blame on you.
7.         All anger is but guilt projected onto others.
8.         To forgive my past is to release it.
9.         To release is to see it no more.
10.     As I release (forgive) my past, I release all others from my projected guilt and self-judgment. As I see myself whole, I see wholeness.
11.     As I heal my guilt about past mistakes, I heal my fear of the future.
12.     To be in the present is to heal (erase) the past.
13.     As I live in the present and love myself as I am now, I like you in the present and see you as you are now.
14.     In the presence of this present moment, there is only Love for ourselves, each other and all that is.