Thursday, April 26, 2012

Right or Happy?

Would you rather be right or be happy?
Most folks are taught to be ‘right’ and never be wrong.
Some believe they can only be happy by always being right.
And some just want to be right!

When we try to be right, we will tend to defend, justify and explain.
When we need to be right, we often make others wrong.
When our personality is attached to being right, we will do anything to win.
When both people need to be right, there are always arguments and defensiveness.

Some work in situations where you much be correct to be employed.
Some try to achieve perfection in their profession.
Some strive for mastery and being the “best”.
Some thrive on the challenge of winning every time with everyone.

Seems like a life fraught with fighting, efforting, constant competing for knowledge and power.
Seems like one would not have many moments of true relaxation, enjoyment and inner peace.
Seems like happiness would be fleeting and based only on being right, correct and winning.
Seems like relationships would be based on who can fight the best for being “right”.

It probably is obvious I prefer happiness.
I would rather be happy than be “right”.
My happiness is constant with very few moments in which I lose my way.
I am happy to be wrong and to be corrected.

Making mistakes is fun, safe and easy for me.
This affirmation helped me undo the strong teaching from my Dad who loved to argue.
He used politics, ethics, religion, anything that would make us “think” and express ourselves.
My Dad used arguing as a way to develop of confidence, self expression and commitment.

I see the value of his teaching , but never felt comfortable with anyone losing.
Everyone deserves to feel important and be heard with respect and understanding.
I learned from another teacher, perhaps my most important lesson in this regard.
“Express your position and viewpoint one time.  
Let it go when there is disagreement and resistance.
 Immediately listen to the others’ point of view with respect. 
 Learn to walk, think and sit in the other persons shoes and see through their eyes.”

As I have practiced this powerful teaching, I recognize how valuable it is to understand differences.
It has helped professionally and personally.
It has encouraged me to let go of attachment.
It has invited real respectful communication.
It has opened my mind to realize there is no right way.
It has allowed me true and lasting happiness.
It has given me a window into others lives like no other.
It has erased all need to judge, criticize and correct.
It has created harmony in my relationships.

I would rather be happy.
I no longer need to be ”right” about anything.
I am an eternal learned and always expanding my perspective.
I am willing to be corrected, criticized and made wrong, because I know I am hearing the other’s view.

When I am willing to learn, I am open and happy.
When I am willing to make mistakes, I am learning and happy.
When I am willing to be wrong, I am forgiving all of our mistakes.
When I am open and learning, forgiving and accepting, I am happy.

Thank us all for our willingness to let go and learn to be happy and love, no matter what.
Wars, fights, violence, defensiveness will fall away and we will all be happy and at peace.
Are you willing?

Loving our different choices,
Betty Lue 

Do It Anyway
People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered.  
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.  
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies.  Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you.  
Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy it all overnight.  
Build anyway.  

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous.  
Be happy anyway.  

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow.  
Do good anyway.  

Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough.  
Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.  

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God.  
It was never between you and them anyway.