When seeking help from friend, therapist, partner, teacher, advisor, what do you want?
If you come to tell stories again and again, do you want agreement or a compassionate listener?
If you come to find your inner truth when you tell you perceptions, are you listening to your voice?
If you come to have a judgment deciding who is right and who is right, are you want to be judged?
If you come to have parental punishment and time out, do you respect the views of your parent figure?
If you come to dump your “poopy” viewpoint hoping someone will flush your toilet, will you keep on pooping and expecting someone to clean up after you?
If you come to get answers, creative solutions and advice, do you argue with or ignore what is advised?
If you come willing to be responsible and seeking spiritual counsel, are you willing to respond with love?
Suggestions:
Ask with respect from those you seek help, answers, advice, listening and compassion.
Be specific about your request for time and listening.
Ask when they might have time for you.
Give them the opportunity to say “No” without losing your love and respect.
Compensate them with gratitude, remuneration, kindness, valuing and using what is given.
Give them positive feedback by letting them know what worked for you.
What does the friend, therapist, teacher, advisor do with what you bring to the table?
If they have time, they will listen endlessly to your repeating stories with an open heart.
They may take on your pain.
They may sacrifice their energy.
They may make myself sick with worry.
If they know the dilemma is yours, they will let it go trusting you to learn and grow.
They will be clear that you will find the learning and the answers you need within you.
They will not take on your problems, but will let go and let God.
They will see it all as part of your sacred journey and spiritual development.
If they have the same dilemma or issue, they may respond to you as they would to themselves.
They may give your direct advice, tough love, or simply be at a loss about what to do or say.
They may direct you into their own mess of emotions and complication without understanding.
They may agree with you that you are in deep do-do and simply commiserate or sympathize.
If they have an inner connection with Source and spiritual guidance, they may listen and respond.
They may listen deeply to your own confusion and invite your to clear your viewpoint.
They may help you see things differently and ask you to shine a light on the situation.
They may teach you skills and ask you to practice them before thinking you know the answers.
If they are trained in therapy, counseling, coaching, they may have a deeper awareness and understanding.
They may direct you to do your own work to clear you fear, to judge nothing, to see things differently.
They may invite your to forgive your past limiting beliefs and misunderstandings.
They may encourage you to take total responsibility for the healing and peaceful solutions.
Suggestions
Seek the right person for the right reason to be your supporter, advisor, cheerleader, counselor.
Let them know if what they offer is not working for you.
Be grateful for their willingness to give the best they have.
Be sensitive to their boundaries and value their time, money and energies with respect.
Treat them as you want to be treated when you are giving of yourself and your resources.
Learn in these helping and supportive relationships what works and doesn’t work for you.
Stop asking for what others cannot give and appreciate what they can and are willing to give.
Value and utilize what works and let the rest go.
There is no greater reward for the helper then to have their guidance be useful and effective.
Everyone wants to be kind and helpful, but some may not able or willing because of their own limitations.
Respect and gratitude are key in receiving what you want from others.
Blessings of gratitude for our united willingness to learn and teach one another.
We are in this together, here to grow with peace and understanding.
Blessings to us, one and all.
Betty Lue
30 Days to Enlightenment
30 Days to Waking Up
30 Days to Healing
30 Days to Seeing things Differently!
This exercise was given to me from Spirit within over 15 years ago.
It has a profound impact on how we see and live our lives.
This daily practice will heal and transform our lives.
With continued practice, there will be a spiritual awakening.
Forgiveness heals our perception and gives us Response-Ability.
Choice empowers us to Create our Experience Consciously.
Gratitude expands what we Choose and increases our Joy.
Daily Practice:
Begin each morning with a pad of lined paper and a pen.
Write and say 30 forgivenesses as they come to mind.
Simply write “I forgive”…and let the rest just come from within.
(No need to understand or feel anything.)
I forgive you for being mean.
I forgive myself for letting anyone hurt me.
I forgive my body’s limitation.
I forgive myself for being late.
I forgive everything.
Make the sound “AAAH” for 1-2 minutes.
Imagine that you are opening your mind.
Now write and say 30 Choices.
I choose to be happy.
I choose to be free.
I choose to do what I love.
I choose to forgive….
In the Evening (before bed)
Write and say 30 Gratitudes
I appreciate the energy I have.
I love being happy.
I am grateful I have you in my life.
I thank God.
Make the sound “OM” the Universal sound for Love and God for 1-2 minutes.
PS Even a few of each is better than none.
Do what you can and trust it is working.
Loving You always,
Betty Lue