All upsets are past similars. You are never upset about what appears to be the issue, but rather an earlier experience which was never resolved, healed or understood. Being upset is an indication that you are off purpose. Being upset is a wakeup call to see where you have forgotten your essence. Or you have lost your focus and have become a “victim” of the world you see. Being hurt is an indication that you have taken another’r conscious or unconscious behavior or words personally. Other's upsets and anger are not about you, but rather anger with or within themselves. Being offended is an indication that you have a button, a place of vulnerability, that is calling for your compassion and healing.
When you are upset, it is helpful to stop, notice and give positive attention to how to clear your upset. Just as a conscious parent would do for a child. Take time alone. Ask yourself, "What is upsetting you? What is it that you want? How can I support you in finding your center and your purpose again?"
You may need time to sit and listen and write your feelings. You want to be listened to, not defended against, to be able to get to the bottom. To express your feelings to the one who may have pushed your buttons will not yield neutral listening, so go be alone and write. You will find at the bottom of all upsets are historical patterns of reading other’s anger or withdrawal or impatience, or lateness or …. as your fault. You will find your mind making up…”I am wrong…I am not enough.…I never get the love I want.”.etc.
After hearing your own upsetting thoughts.
Ask yourself what you need to heal and clear those thoughts and feelings.
Offer forgiveness.
Ask to see it all differently.
Ask to see from the other’s perspective.
Ask to let go and love again.
Ask to release your sensitivity and emotional button.
Ask to be the conscious one and learn from the experience.
Forgive yourself for letting anyone or anything hurt you.
You may wish to return to the other and share with them your personal healing process.
It is always valuable to thank them for pushing your button or upsetting you, to let you know what inside you needed healing. You will feel grateful to them when you have done the inner healing work.
Be Aware: You will continue to feel anger, hurt and resentment until you do the inner work to help and heal yourself.
Blessing us all with healing and inner peace.
Betty Lue