Thursday, August 13, 2015

Listen and Respond!

I listen to my inner self and respond to myself consistently.
I love and care about what I really need.
The more I listen to and respond to myself, the more I can listen and respond to others.
The more I love, trust and respect myself, the more I love, trust and respect others.

Is Anyone Listening?

Do we understand what is needed?
Do we know what we are doing?
Do we listen to our own feelings?
Do we even care?

Who is paying attention?
Only when we are clear can we really notice.
Who is feeling what is happening?
Only when we are at peace can we really hear.

When a baby cries, they are communicating.
When an elder speaks, they are communication.
When our body hurts, it is communicating.
When we feel upset, we are communicating.

When there is upset or disagreement, there is communication.
When the world is in turmoil, it is communicating.
When bills are overdue, there is communication.
When the house is a mess, there is communication.

Everything and everyone is sending messages.
When no one is responding, the communication gets louder.
All things are lessons we need to learn.
Everything wants attention.

Positive attention yields positive results.
Respect and kindness yield respectful conclusions.
When we stop and listen deeply, we can hear the underlying need.
When we ignore and override, we cannon listen and respond.

True communication requires a willingness to listen.
True communication requires the maturity to not take things personally.
True communication asks that we care about the outcome.
True communication invites us to pay attention without attachment.

When we have taken impeccable care of ourselves, we can listen.
When w have listened and responded to our own needs, we can hear others.
When we have managed first our own essential priorities, we can take the time.
When we have loved and appreciated our own communication, we can respond to others.

Listening to oneself requires quiet time and space.
Listening to our own inner voice is essential to know ourselves.
Responding to our own needs consistently invites us to love ourselves.
Caring about what matters to us is needed to be willing to care about others.

When we love ourselves, we have the time and patience and willingness to love others.
When we listen to and respond to our own needs, we have the awareness to listen to and respond to others.
Take the time.
Give yourself the attention you need FIRST.

Loving me is loving you,
Betty Lue

Successful Communication Keys:
Calm tone of voice and be on the same level.
Ask permission to speak
Tune in to where they are with desire to understand.
Give what will create the greatest safety and respect.
Talk with kindness and in private.
Step away until both parties are calm.  Use time-outs as needed.
Defuse the stress, urgency and upset, before attempting to talk.
Be clear when you don’t have time or patience to listen.
Write communication to avoid confrontations and arguments.
Allow all parties time to think about their needs and possible equitable solutions.
Encourage using “I feel….., I want…… and I am willing………
Seek cooperative agreement, rather than punishment, threat or demand.
Open your heart to understand (“Walk in their shoes”)
Choose an outcome where everyone wins.