Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Are We Complete?

When we are done, there will be total peace.
When we are complete, we will have no fear.
When we are whole, we shall be in Love.
When we are free, we will have perfect trust.

What does it take to have honorable closure?
When can we tell if we need to walk away?
How do we say good bye with love and respect?
Can you release those you love with “Fare thee well?”

Do you try too hard to please?
Do you stay the course for loyalty?
Do you give too much to get return?
Do you cling to what no longer is healthy for you?

Are you addicted to the pain and pleasure?
Are you attached to what is familiar and a comfort zone?
Do you deny the pain and intensify the pleasure?
Do you know you deserve what is healthy, supportive and inspires your best?

Both attraction and repulsion indicate there is something to learn.
Both teacher and student benefit from their interaction.
When we are awake and paying attention, we can see things anew.
When we find ourselves growing in faith and learning to trust, we know all is well.

When we contract in fear, we start shutting down.
When we live in regret, our guilt and shame stop our growth.
When we are resentful and seek revenge, we become dark with anger.
When we reject and abandon ourselves or others, we are confused and lost.

When we can easily say I am sorry , we are healing.
When we can gently forgive with our blessing, we are seeking the light.
When we can appreciate the learning, the healing and grow, we are releasing.
When we can honestly say “I Love You”, we are complete.

When all is said and done, Love is the completion.
When we are at peace, we are true to ourselves.
When we have no fear, no avoidance, no guilt or blame, we can claim true forgiveness.
When we are again giving our love, blessings and gratitude freely, we are done.

Let us complete each moment with full appreciation and open-mindedness,
Betty Lue
Honorable Closure        

How do you complete a relationship, a marriage, a teaching-learning experience, a job, a friendship? How do you know you are really complete?
Often people walk away without really finishing the spiritual work, because it is easier emotionally.   People don’t know how to come to a truly peaceful place, where “good-bye” is really “God be with You.”  
When we are complete, we are at peace and in love.  
We have no regrets, no resentments, no unhappy memories. 

Honorable closure acknowledges:
1)   the learning and growth received, 
2)   challenges and difficulties experienced, 
3)   appreciation of gifts and blessings, 
4)   forgiveness and amends made. 

Acknowledge within your self and with the other person all that you have learned and how you have grown and benefited from the experience. 

Honor and express the challenges and difficulties that occurred and perhaps were endured during the time together. 

Offer your gratitude and appreciation to the other for the benefits you received.

Share your forgiveness and/or make amends for those places of unconscious or conscious errors of omission or commission.  Often neither party is aware of what went unexpressed until the two have an opportunity to talk together.  This is very valuable when done with the conscious intention for a peaceful conclusion.  

And lastly, give your full appreciation and blessings to those whom you are leaving.   

Honorable closure always includes a face to face or heart to heart connection so that all parties have a full opportunity to express their piece of the whole. Incompletion is never one sided. If one party loses and is in grief neither person is at peace.  
Do your part when you part. 
When we complete a relationship, job, living situation with honor for all, we are free to choose again without being haunted by the past or unconsciously repeating the same patterns. 

To move on, to create anew, to be fully inspired requires honorable closure.  Begin now.

Saying good-bye can be done with love, respect and profound gratitude and inner peace.
 Betty Lue