Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Where Have All the Families Gone?

I now live in healthy relationships.
I treat everyone with trust, respect and appreciation.
I forgive us all for neglecting care of ourselves and our families.
I undo any unhealthy habit of mind or words quickly and easily.
I love to love everyone with the dignity and respect they deserve.

(See menu bar to left for our Success Seminars this month in three locations and on line recording.)

What is a healthy family?
Do parents know how to parent well?
Do we treat our children and elders with respect?
Are we teaching values, ethics and principles ?

Do we live according day to day, without a goal?
Are we guided by media, our associations or a standard that is healthy.
Do we teach our children by our example?
Do we make mature choices and treat ourselves with respect and appreciation?

We must have pictures of wholeness and healthy regard for all people.
We must remember how to sit together and be in positive conversation.
We must learn how to listen to one another with respect and compassion.
We must discipline ourselves to always be our best and give our best.

1.     Families become families because they share common goals.
2.     Families are successful because they are honest and keep confidences.
3.     Families work when everyone does their best to participate and contribute.
4.     Families support one another by committing to what is good for each one.
5.     Families encourage responsibility without using guilt or blame.

If you have never seen a family that discusses things without yelling, how could you know?
If you have never been in a family that prepares and eats meals together, how would you know?
If you have never witnessed a family that does their chores together, how could you know how?
If you have never been a part of a democratic decision-making, how would you know it is possible?

Organizations, businesses, teams, friendships, partnerships and families all can learn.
When we are willing to do better, we will learn better ways to relate.
When we are open to stop doing what does not work, we will be willing to explore what does work.
When we forgive ourselves for pushing our way harder and do what is smarter, we will succeed.

Success is not difficult, when there is no resistance.
Success in family relationships can be achieved by one person.
Success in any relationship requires that one person be willing to make new ways of respectful relating.
Success in every family comes from the willingness to forgive the past and begin again each day.

Where there is safety, people feel loved and valued.
Where there is stability, people feel loved and safe.
Where there is confidentiality, people feel loved and respected.
Where there is open-mindedness, people feel loved and heard.

There is lack of knowledge or experience of safety, stability, confidentiality and open-mindedness.
It is difficult to understand and demonstrate these four qualities, when we have little experience of them.
Healthy relationships are defined by respect, responsibility and co-operation.
Dysfunctional families may be unaware of what these ideals include.

Our culture must learn to build healthy lives, healthy communication, healthy relating.

Willing to teach, inspire and remind us all to practice everyday, 
Betty Lue